Time to get serious

You know the life of a super famous Hollywood actor isn't all hot tub parties, booze, and broads. Mostly it is, but once in a while even famous people like me have to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Sometime we are court ordered to give back to community, and sometimes it just makes common sense to throw your name and support out there for a worthy cause. It is in this spirit that I would like to hereby announce my full support for John Mclane for president.It's really a no brainer. I couldn't believe my ears when I heard some fellow famous people talking about politics the other day. They were talking about voting for that guy who broke those buildings, that Obama fellow. Call me old fashioned but I think our president should be someone who tries to save buildings from being broke. You know, like John Mclane. Someone who's not afraid to walk through glass in his bare feet to save a bunch of people. A true American hero. So remember to vote this December for John Mclane. Yippee Ki Ay Motherfuckers!

I just wanted to remind you...

I'm Steve Zahn! I'm a famous hollywood actor. My life is better than yours, and therefore more important and meaningful. That's all I have.

Remember me? Just kidding, of course you do. I'm famous.

Ah famous people humor. It's much better than regular people humor. Naturally. I haven't written in awhile because, frankly I have so many better and more important things going on in my life than to chat with a bunch of non celebs. But I figure you need me to put value and meaning in your pathetic lives. It's my way of giving back to the community I guess. Actually it better count as community service or I'm gonna kick the crap out of my attorney. He's not a famous attorney, which is troublesome to me, but he knows a lot of famous people, so we'll see. I'm sure you'll be seeing a lot of me soon, you know in movies and on tv and stuff. well I gotta go drive my convertible to the health spa, where my personal trainer is waiting to help keep me fit and sexy for the important work I do for humanity. MMM. It's a good Thursday. The cocaine is pure, the car is fast, and the hookers are free. I bet you didn't know that. Hookers follow famous people around all the time, and have sex with them for free. It doesn't suck. Unless you want them too. HA HA. I'm hilarious. You know what else is hilarious? Strange Wilderness. Just a suggestion for you. Check it out on those lonely nights where you're jonesing for a little Zahn.

Jeff Goldblum is watching you poop

I was afraid of this. This explains so much. It has to be true. I found this on the internet after all.

Jeff Goldblum is at it again

Jeff Goldblum is only kidding when he says mean things about me. http://www.the-scoremagazine.com/archives/62
We are actually really good friends. All famous people are friends of course. Ol' Jeffy and his shenanigan's. HeeHee. He's quite a character, that one. He loves me. I'm Steve Zahn. I'm famous. I bet most of you out there are jealous at all the attention I get from the man who flew his VW bus spaceship into Geena Davis' swimming pool. Good times. Go Zahn?

Here is another example of me being awesome.

Look how cool I am.

Check it out. Here I am playing lead guitar in a cool rock band. And even cooler still, I'm playing lead guitar in a cool rock band in a famous Hollywood feature film. Just watch this. I'm amazing. Go Zahn!

The gloves are off

Okay Jeff. Have it your way. I intended for this forum to be a place to commune with the regular folk who don't reside in our lofty orbit, but you have seen fit to ruin it by using your fancy words and stuff. You know where to find me Jeff. If you want to have it out with me you can just come over sometime. You still have a toothbrush in my bathroom. We shouldn't fight in front of the normals. This should be done behind closed doors and only be viewable to the famous. Don't bite off anything farther than you can throw Jeffy. You'll rue the day. Go Zahn!